Offering Hope and Encouragement in the Midst of Sorrow

                                     WHO AM I?

Many years ago the television program What’s My Line asked the question, “Who am I” at the beginning of every program. Books titled “Who am I,” try to answer the age old question in the minds of children and adults alike.  Songs are written with the intent to enlighten the listener about who they are, and party games called “Who am I” provide entertainment to the light hearted. Some cults use “Who am I” as a mantra, repeating it over and over in an attempt to “find themselves.” The question “Who am I” seems to be one that some people find amusing and others struggle with in all earnestness. Whether widows/widowers feel that who they were was defined by their spouse in a positive way or a negative way, they are now attempting to redefine who they are without them.

Frequently in the blog world bloggers have the question “Who am I,” on their sidebar. It is not unusual for women to describe themselves as a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a friend. Men often answer the question by first defining themselves in light of their occupation, then as a husband, and a father. Relationships and positions seem to be a large part of defining who we are. It is logical to be defined by those two distinctions. Who we are influences the relationships and positions we seek and the relationships and positions we seek influence who we are! How is that for sounding confusing?

As a married person you may have never questioned, “Who am I.”
You easily found your identity in and through your marriage, and most likely understood more of who you were through the validation your spouse offered.

Relationships and positions are frequently woven together overlapping in their definition. The position of wife is also a relationship. The position of husband speaks to a relationship as well. Our role as a parent is all about our relationship with our children, but it too is a position. Occupations are a position, but they influence relationships. Especially for men occupations sometimes define who they are as much as their relationships.

Genetics, personalities, parental influences and life circumstances shape who we are during our early years. Our history can affect the choices we make in our adult relationships and positions, but as adults we have a greater ability to affect what role we play in our relationships and positions. Our personalities and current life circumstances add yet another piece to the "Who am I" puzzle.  The question must be asked however, “Are relationships, positions, genetics, history, personality, and life circumstances, really the core issues when it comes to determining who we are?” If we base our analysis of who we are solely in terms of these things, will we come to an accurate conclusion as to who we are? When widows and widowers are forced to reevaluate who they are, will they come up short handed when trying to rebuild their lives? Their genetics, history, and personality remain the same, but current life circumstances, relationships and position have changed. Without determining who they are through understanding the core issues, they will not be able to fully come to an understanding of who they are in the absence of the framework that once existed for them. One must also question if their view of who they were was built on a solid foundation during their marriage, or if marriage had created a comfortable place where core issues did not need to be dealt with.

                                   What are the core issues?

The most basic and imperative core issue revolves around our relationship with Jesus Christ. Without accepting His saving grace in our lives, the question of who we are can never be answered. If you have not resolved this most important core issue in your life, please click on the page, “Where to Begin” before continuing with this study.

                                               Ready to begin?

Each page will act as a guide to help you evaluate who you are, viewing your position and relationships through the core issues. Each page has room for you to write answers that apply the study to your own life. Print off each section and write your thoughts in the space made available. Not only will this help the information become personal to you, it will serve as a journal of your thoughts. Reading through each section with the intent of coming up with a quick answer to who you are won’t be helpful. The more time spent on thinking through each section, the more you will begin to define who you are.

Let’s get started! Return to the buttons on the left and click on the next page,  Part 1 “I Have a Position”.